Condemning Silence

I need You, Lord.
I can’t make it in this life without You.
I won’t go through it without You.
I’m overjoyed that I don’t have to go through it without You!

Your presence is all the existence that I want to know.
Your provision is all that I need.
Your love becomes my courage, my skills, and my identity.

I don’t want my days to just begin and end with You.
I want my life to be Your life.

I can stretch the limits of my vocabulary, and yet I just feel so helpless to really pour out how I feel about my Lord!

Andrew Trivette Random Ideas

Families are funny things. A group of people brought together by blood and love to form an odd little unit. A unit designed by God to be an unbreakable bond, an unshakeable foundation, no matter what. But let’s face the reality: that’s just not what we experience in the real world. Every family I’ve ever seen is full of hurt, and betrayal. That’s not to say that families don’t provide love and comfort, but often the pivotal moments that we remember in our family relationships are the ones involving pain. These moments of pain and heartache can define our future and have a lasting impact on the quality of our relationships throughout the rest of our lives.

So what do we make of this? What do we do when those who we expect to be our foundation hurt us? I believe with each dose of pain we have a choice. We can allow the pain to take it’s natural course, and cause us to withdraw. It can cause us to trust a little less, and love a little less. It can cause us to settle for destructive relationships, assuming the lack of good relationships is somehow our fault. The end result is that the pain we have experienced destroys our lives, and is simply passed onto the next generation. A vicious cycle of pain and mistrust is created. This is the default route, and it is far too often allowed to take it’s course.

BUT there is anther way! We have a choice! These cycles can be broken!
We only need to realize two things:

1.) Avoiding Pain at All Costs is Dangerous

The first mistake that we make is to assume that good relationships are free of mistakes, or free of pain. I think that far to often we elevate comfort as the primary goal of life, and this is completely contrary to Scripture. We were created for a purpose, not merely to take up oxygen! Fulfilling our purpose requires growth, and growth only comes as the result of a little pain. Think of it like blisters. No one likes them, but after a few blisters we get to enjoy the protection of the callouses that are formed as a result. (now I’m not recommending our relationships should be calloused mind you!) In the same way, the pain and heartaches that we experience in our lives can, if we choose to, help us develop into better, more understanding, caring, and forgiving people.

Remember, bitterness is not the result of pain or betrayal, it is the result of our choice to focus on that pain, and make it part of who we are. Bitterness can only survive in a me-centric outlook. Our pain can either be our gift, or our curse. The only difference is what we choose to do with it. Do we choose to use it to help us be more compassionate to those around us, who are also dealing with their own hurts? Or do we sit in selfishness, dwelling on our own problems, using them as an excuse to love a little less?

The choice is yours.

So far we have established the benefits that can be reaped from dealing with our hurt and channeling it into growth and love, but we haven’t dealt with the pivotal question of HOW to deal with the pain we experience.

Keep reading!

2.) Everyone needs to be in a perfect relationship

Our lives completely revolve around our relationships. Our quality of life has nothing to do with the economy, science, technology, or physical capabities. Humans are unequivocally social creatures, and our lives rise and fall around this one fact.

Combine this fact with the idea that I opened with, and we’re in trouble. If our lives are based on relationships, and yet we all experience pain and heartache in our relationships, then we have a problem!

What we need is a foundational relationship that’s perfect. We need one that we can rely on, regardless of what happens in the rest of our relationships. In this relationship we must become so intimate, so trusting(read: vulnerable) that it becomes our very identity. It must define who we are, and what we’re capable of. It must provide all of our “daily recommended dose of love”.
It almost sounds ridiculous. No human being on earth could be trusted so much, or could love so much!

But JESUS CAN!

Jesus does love unconditionally! He is unchanging. Always forgving. It’s the perfect relationship!
When Jesus becomes not just a name we invoke to demonstrate our piety, but becomes the core of your identity, I cannot even begin to explain the transformation that can then begin to take place in your relationships. Forgiveness is so much easier to give when you experience it daily first hand! Love is so much easier to give when your life is filled with unconditional love. Betrayal is so much less earth-shattering when your first love is still standing by your side! Forgiving hurt becomes possible when you’re receiving unwarranted love and forgiveness. Relationships become easier when we realize that they’re never about receiving a fair trade(thank goodness!), but about giving, and forgiving.

A relationship with Jesus Christ affects your self-worth. It gives you the power to mend relationships that can be mended, and gives you the power to break off abusive relationships that need to be broken. When you begin to comprehend how much the Lord really adores you, your other relationships don’t have the power to tell you that you’re not valuable, or talented, or lovable.

Think I’m nuts? I’m not talking about anything that I can’t backup from personal experience! Great relationships ONLY result from a great relationship with Jesus Christ.

If you’re unable to deal with the pain of past or current relationships, then I challenge you to take one more risk. Open your heart up to love and trust in the only relationship that won’t let you down. Get past the idea that the Bible is a description of a way of life, or an ideal to aspire to, or the handbook of behavior for a religious group. It is nothing more or less than a description of the greatest relationship you’ll ever experience, and never deserve. You’ll find all the healing, love, purpose,  and forgiveness that your heart so desperately craves.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest.” Matthew 11:28

Andrew Trivette Healing family, forgiveness, Healing, Jesus Christ, relationships

One of the things closely related to God being our Provider is the topic of tithing. It says in Malachi 3:10

Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!

I think that tithing is simply putting God first in our lives, especially in our finances. With our tithe we are telling God that we trust that He will provide for us with the remainder. It is tempting when we work, and bring home a paycheck to look at that money as our money, that we earned. But tithing is God’s way of reminding us that our money comes from Him, and ultimately is always His. Scripture tells us to tithe, not because the church needs the funds, but because it is important that we be givers, and not just Christians with a greedy, me first attitude.

It says in 2 Corinthians 9:7

7 So let each one give as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver. 8 And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in allthings, may have an abundance for every good work.

This is true for much more than just our money. We should be givers of our time, and our skills. What God gives us, we should always be ready to give back, as He desires.

I can remember many times that I had to make a decision between paying my tithe and paying a bill, and I can honestly say that every time, God provided the money for the bill, when I put Him first with the tithe.

A tithe is generally recognized to be a tenth of our income, but more important than how much we give, it is important to remember that it is ultimately about putting God first in our finances, and when we do, He promises to provide, every time.

Andrew Trivette Scripture Bible study, finances, tithing

This topic is one that has been of great personal interest to me for quite awhile. When I was trying to get through college, working as much as I could, it seemed like I never had enough money to go around. I was always worrying about how to pay the next bill, or whether I could afford to fix my car, buy groceries, etc.  When I was almost finished with school, I knew my current job was coming to an end, and felt like the Lord wanted me to start my own business. It scared the heck out of me, because I liked to know exactly how much money was coming in, where it was coming from, and be able to make my own plans based on that.

In other words, I liked to be in control.

But I went ahead and started my business, still worrying the whole time about where the money was coming from, and how to pay my bills. After a month or so into my business, I was sitting worrying about some bill or the other, when the Lord abruptly asked me: “Have I ever not taken care of you? Have I ever not provided for your needs?”

As simple as it was, it stunned me. I had spent the previous several years miserable when it came to money, but when I looked back I realized that every bill had been paid on time, and every situation had been taken care of. From then on it was as if a huge burden had been released. I didn’t have to worry when the end of the month came around, and there was no money, because I knew God would provide. And He did, every time. The difference was not that God started providing, the difference was that I started trusting Him.

It is important that we believe not only that God can provide for us, but that He will provide for us, because He wants to provide for us.

Andrew Trivette Random Ideas Bible study, provider